Skip to Content

Is 14 And 17 Too Much Of An Age Difference In A Relationship? (Explained)

Is 14 And 17 Too Much Of An Age Difference In A Relationship? (Explained)

Is age simply a number as many people claim? While a 14-year age difference between a 43- and 57-year-old appears to be typical, the gap of 14 years between an 18- and 32-year-old raises some questions.

Even though there may just be a few years between you, things like expectations, priorities, and interests, in general, can change quickly as you age.

As long as it is mutually agreed upon, dating between the ages of 14 and 17 is generally acceptable. However, in reality, there are inevitable obstacles caused by the age discrepancy. The uncertainty, lack of stability, and susceptibility of these young people are frequently used by the older perpetrators.

Keep reading to know details about age differences and how it creates disparities and affection between individuals.

What Is An Age Difference?

The age difference displays the difference in ages between two people. By subtracting two different dates, months, or years, it is simple to calculate; there won’t be a difference in age if the two entities are the same.

In conclusion, research tends to suggest that an age difference of one to three years is ideal in many cultures.

Some researchers contend that even a relationship with an age difference of under 10 years will result in greater happiness. However, when it comes to love, statistics rarely give the whole picture.

Many people believe that age-diverse couples have less successful relationships. However, some research shows that age-gap couples report higher levels of relationship satisfaction.

Additionally, these couples appear to express less envy and more commitment and trust than couples of comparable ages.

Let’s look at the table below, which shows the age difference in heterosexual married couples (2017 USA).

Age DifferencePercentage of Married Couples
Husband 20+ years older than the wife1.0
Husband 15–19 years older than the wife1.6
Husband 10–14 years older than the wife5.0
Husband 6–9 years older than the wife11.2
Husband 4–5 years older than the wife12.8
Husband 2–3 years older than the wife19.6
Husband and wife within 1–2 years33.9
Wife 2–3 years older than husband6.9
Wife 4–5 years older than husband3.4
Wife 6–9 years older than husband2.8
Wife 10–14 years older than husband1.0
Wife 15–19 years older than husband0.3
Wife 20+ years older than husband0.4
Population Survey on Age Gap Difference conducted in the USA, 2017

Factors Affecting Age Difference In A Relationship

Relationship
Age difference in a relationship plays an integral role in shaping future possibilities.

Dating someone who is a few years younger or older than you is rather typical, and frequently the age gap is not a huge concern.

Even when ages don’t match, maturity levels occasionally do. However, there are other factors to take into account when the age gap is greater.

The following factors can have an impact on relationships when there is a significant age gap.

Power

The two in a relationship might have a power imbalance, especially if you’re in different stages of life.

The older person may make decisions or speak on behalf of the younger individual. In particular, when it comes to their worries about the relationship, the younger person could find it more challenging to express their opinions.

Power is affected by many factors besides age. Relationship dynamics can also be influenced by factors such as gender, race, and economic status.

Legal Issues

Legal
Every country has a legal age mentioned for marriage, although following it has never been a problem for people.

Age and sexual relationships are subject to legal restrictions. The legal age of consent for sexual behavior in Canada is 16.

It’s necessary to think about the legal implications if you’re approached by someone considerably older than you, but you can also ask yourself:

  • Can I imagine having a respectful, equal relationship with this person? Or are they more powerful than I am likely to be?
  • Why is this individual doing this?

Sexual Power

Being allowed to explore your sexuality at your own pace is a huge component of feeling good about your sexuality.

When there is a gap in age, the older person could be more experienced and want to take on things that the younger person isn’t ready for.

The younger individual could experience pressure to engage in sexual activity, which is never acceptable. Never feel forced or under pressure to undertake something you aren’t convinced about.

Younger people in relationships are frequently susceptible to being brainwashed or manipulated into sexual behavior, neither of which can ever result in beneficial ends.

Is 14 And 17 Too Much Of An Age Difference In A Relationship?

Relationship
Relationships should always have an age gap that can be leveled with the maturity and mindset of both individuals.

A considerable age gap between 14 and 17 may have a long-term negative impact on some relationships. Others could believe that their shared characteristics are more significant than their age difference.

Even if you’re happy in your relationship, having a significant age gap can present some difficulties.

Taking on and resolving these difficulties—which frequently have to do with outside criticism—could result in even more enjoyment in your relationship; but would it be worth it?

Just as being younger does not always imply being less emotionally mature, being the older partner does not guarantee emotional maturity.

Because more years can equal more time to create complicated opinions via exposure to various situations, people occasionally equate age with emotional maturity.

Have a look at the problems faced by couples living with a huge age difference.

What Is An Acceptable Age Difference?

It can be challenging to determine exactly what age difference is and is not acceptable because every relationship is unique and is affected by an age gap in a different way.

Children are children, regardless of what their driver’s license says, and crossing that barrier is undesirable. Therefore, it is always a warning sign when an older person expresses interest in or pressure for a connection with someone under the age of 18.

It should be mentioned that even after you reach the legal age of maturity, many people still view you as a child because ages 18 and 19 still seem very young and inexperienced; ages 20 can also fall into this category.

For those who prefer to put a number on things, an age difference between adults of typically 1 to 7 years can be deemed tolerable.

People whose ages are within 1-3 years usually do not notice a significant age difference, but years 4–7 may start to feel a little more noticeable.

Different Types Of Relationships

Toxic

Toxic relationships include reactive behavior from one or both partners as well as dysfunctional communication. These people cause problems and exacerbate them while frequently viewing themselves as the victim.

Toxic
Toxic relationships can disrupt mental peace and well-being.

Your relationship may be toxic if your spouse habitually acts in an unrespectful, dishonest, bossy, or unsupportive manner.

Negative relationships can evolve. But there is a pretty large “if” there. Only if both parties are equally determined to end the toxic relationship and engage in frequent open dialogue will it be able to transform.

Emotional

Emotional
Emotional relationships are often tolerated rather than loved and cherished.

A feeling of congruence and intimacy between two individuals that transcends mere physical attraction, amusement, cursory talks, or even intellectual similarity is known as an emotional connection.

The capacity to engage in in-depth, meaningful conversations with your partner about topics like feelings, friends, family issues, politics, religion, ambitions, and dreams allows you to feel emotionally connected to them.

Conclusion

  • Navigating age disparities can be challenging. There may be challenges to take into account if you are interested in someone who is much older or younger than you, or if you are already in a relationship with a considerable age difference. These challenges might not exist for couples who are closer in age.
  • You may manage some of these issues and foster an environment of clear, open communication by speaking with an online therapist. However, there may be some situations when age gaps are too great to bridge.
  • Age differences are not inherently acceptable or bad, but there are aspects of a relationship that can make it work or fall flat, like trust, thoughtfulness, respect, and kindness.
  • Regardless of the age gap between you and your partner, you both deserve a happy relationship.

Related Articles

Skip to content